Saturday, August 29, 2015

This Week in Hell: Addendum

I just found out my cat is very emaciated and on the verge of dying. More DEATH. GREAT.

This Week, in Hell:

My week has been both simultaneously uneventful and eventful. *deep sigh*

Letting the summary of hell commence…

1. School begins again. I'm a nineteen year old retard who went to a place that didn't give me work and let me run rampant. I fucked up and spent two years fucking around. It has been my most regretful "choice", or arguably, series of choices in life. So I'm stuck in high school for another year, and if I don't graduate, I'm snatching that GED. I'm not the only nineteen year old crammed into this hell, obviously, I'm just the most immature, retarded one who won't be able to mentally handle one more year of juvenile bull.

2. The saving grace of high school is this year, I'm friends with a group of girls who are not exactly juvenile, they're fun loving but not necessarily childish. So I start off the year on a better social note than the last.

3. Unfortunately, the closest thing I had to a "boyfriend" at one time is going to college.

 he'll get nabbed by some stupid sophomore or fellow freshman slut who is a looooot more experienced than I am. That makes me very angry because above all I know it's probable and very likely to happen unless he's one of those straight arrows who wants to deal wit me and my PsychoBitchAss, because I'm some pure little angel who somehow trumps the hot, beautiful, college girls throwing themselves at him.

The truth is that I'm very sexually and physically frustrated and I just want to make out with him to loud rock music.

Unfortunately he's dealt with his share this summer and I'm pretty sure that is brought him to an emotional low. And I think he just doesn't wanna show his emotions to anyone right now.

Guys don't like to show their emotions to women because of the vulnerability factor and the asshole mindset some have that additionaly deters them from doing so (that "men who show their emotions are weak", fuck off, all of you). I didn't even know what to say when I found out the kind of shit he was dealing with and it took me forever to respond because I'm a fuckin asshole who's dealing with my mental issues, so I guess that makes me a shit "friend".

He responded to me earlier this week before going on an ignore spree. I think he's goddamn mad and honestly, he has a right to be. I feel a bit dead at this. No, I feel angry. Mainly at myself. I lipsynced and thrust myself around the apartment trippng over shit while dancing in the most awkward and painfully sad way. Like I'm just done with myself.

Men are hard to read. I'm probably wrong. I have a feeling this whatever this is, its screwed. I can try buying concert tix and he'll probably still say no. I can do whatever and I'll still end up right where I am currently. That's what I feel.

But I care about this hopeless cause and hopeless case that's about to hang itself by a fucking noose. I care way too much. You don't just stop caring overnight about someone. You just don't. Men can get over shit easier than I can. They always do. Most people do. I toss myself into a deep ravine and expect to come out uninjured, every time. It's bullshit. I dedicate myself so much to people thinking it's going to last. Does it ever? Rarely. And you know what sucks? This is the first time in a long time I've felt like this and it's just gonna end in the same shit way because it took me five plus months to come out of the closet about caring.

My school didn't have a prom last year. Or a dance. Or a homecoming. We had shit funding and no takers. I wish there was a way I could've. Then maybe I wouldn't have spent months pondering. Perhaps there would've been something that ignited some excitement in me, that urged me to confess. My love for the whimsical, dumb shit known as prom, if you go with the right person, knows no bounds.

I tried on a prom dress at the end of last year when the event was long past. It was a long flowing frock, a beautiful perwinkle color. Whenever I look at the picture in question I want to cry. I wanted even one night that wasn't graduation. I didn't get jack. But I did this to myself. This is all me. Hell. Hell. Hell!!!!!

4. General mood hell. Kind of mentioned above. I'm in my own mental funk. I stopped taking my proper prescriptions or started halving them to avoid having to eat more again, to avoid heightened appetite, which is basically regressing back to myself in 2013-2014, it's a very poor decision and yet, I dont feel myself regretting it physically. What's really affecting me is lack of sleep. I'm super moody and lackadaisical mainly because of the fact that I've been averaging four hours or less per night. 

The only day I got more than five hours under my belt was Thursday/Friday, when I was out cold by eight, and woke up at five thirty the next morning, feeling the giddiest I'd felt in what felt like a month, having finally obtained a fair amount of rest in comparison to my dismal track record. I was so fucking happy. I sent my "friend" a selfie, shockingly got no reply, I went through school literally vibrating with excitement and glee, got out early and drove with one of my new friends (who seems sweet, but I have my hesitance) like a madman to the mall.

The rapture of course didn't totally last. Once she was out of the car, I began to feel tears bubbling up for no particular reason other then the fact that I was once again by myself. Alone. And then my brain sneered at me that that would always be the case. That poor poor pitiful audrey will mostly be alone. Thanks, brain. And I cranked up the radio to drown out those sounds, I pretty much tried to bust my eardrums so I couldn't hear my own godawful sniveling noises. I engulfed myself in sound just to numb it all away. It was exasperating how it took me so long to keep up the happiness before my feelings collapsed on top of me like a damn skyscraper.

It never fully gets better does it?

Always feeling like people are using you, out to get you, to hurt you, to pity you and toss you out. It's the same bullshit paranoia and I don't know, just when it seemed like it was diminishing it came back with hellish resurgence.

Nobody in my life is helping me. They're all too caught up in their own hell. I've been through six out of seven fucking circles of it in the last twelve years. 

I wish I could especially tell the dude who I'm trying to communicate with, that very fact. Like, "look, man, my mother hurt me and mentally scarred me, I live with all these inherent mental issues and people used to bully me to attempted suicide, among other things, but I'm still here!!! You don't have to live through your hell alone!!! You don't!!!"

If I don't change my anti anxiety medication my meds won't be able to fully help me anymore either. The buspar has lost its charm and I've rendered it near useless at this point. Doesn't work like it used to. Doesn't provide me the proper energy. Doesn't fuckin' work effectively anymore. And they won't give me Xanax even though I've had small dosages before for panic attacks / bad days on my record and have NEVER shown signs of being addicted to it. There has to be something stronger. Upping my SSRIs makes me fat AND doesn't work.

5. Whilst shopping with my friend I bought a couple shirts. Pretty pedestrian and mundane hot topic shit because I love men's shirts, band shirts, snark shirts, and pop culture shirts. The last TPR shirt they had in stock was an XL, so I went for a Doors shirt (one of the many band shirts I didn't own til yesterday; and there's still more to collect! I want that Who t-shirt, ya hear?), and a Sam shirt (from SPN, because Jared is a big puppy who makes me feel better, albeit temporarily). Then a skirt from that Charlotte Whatever store, which WAS selling ONE, ONE of those button up denim skirt styles I've been looking for (unfortunately not in the preferred color, but that can be slightly forgiven) and unfortunately not in a fitting size, they had sizes 6-12 without a 0-4 in sight… I ended up buying the aforementioned ten dollar black maxi skirt from the clearance section that looks like something Fiona Goode would approve of. And that was that. I seemed fun on the outside but on the inside there was a slight pained tingle.
Maybe it was just thinking too much about it all at once.

I spilled some to my friend but I thought unloading all the contents of my head onto her, especially as someone rather new to me, would not exactly be optimal. Even so, by the end of that day, I felt like I was choking, I got home and began lipsyncing to furious rock music.

6. For schoolwork itself, it's disgusting, atrocious, and just plain annoying. One of my half credits last year was displaced and even though I did a half semester of English, it's not appearing in the system, so I have to redo. Government is an actual threatening, ugly, in your face BEAR, and the only person who I WANT to help me with it is in some kind of despair or busy busy about to start college hell, both I guess. My teacher also refuses to tell me when the FUCK we're gonna get chemistry books, I NEED to finish the last half of it, but no one seems to understand that enough to hurry the fuck UP about getting said books!!!! In other words, it's a pretty damn disjointed mess.

Sunday, August 23, 2015

Japanese Fashion Magazines: The Bad and the Ugly

For the second part of my Japanese magajiin feature, we're going to focus on the cons, or the relatively bad parts of Japanese fashion magazines, this will mainly rely on vanity related things and the fact that the magazines dedicate, and designate, entire 20+ page sections to "beautify yourself by practicing our diets, and you too can look like our models" crap.

 The Bad

Japan is known for its absurd standards of beauty. Asia in general is known for being slimmer than the rest of the Fat World by a landslide with obesity percentiles affecting about 5% of the population. Japan is a very appearance conscious society, and that is reflected in the fact that:

The models are extremely skinny.

If you ever thought yourself a skinny white girl, in a land of American landwhales, prepare to have your confidence squandered by the girls in Japanese fashion magazines. 

So you think 25 inches is the slim size for a waist, how about 24? Or 23? Or 21, even? Good, because that's the Japanese model "norm". 25 is now fat. Get the fuck out, fatty!

Now, understand this. Japan is a "smaller" society. 

so there's no saying, that if you moved there yourself, as a westerner - and exercised as much as they did merely through foot transport- you would not lose weight yourself. But also don't go prancing around the fact that the girls are absurdly skinny. Don't go skirting around it, understand it's fashion standard, but don't go prancing around it. 

In particular I think the most exemplary girl in J-fashion magazines to use for the "absurdly fucking skinny" example is Kawakita Mayuko, whose legs look like fucking this.

 Let's check her measurements.


Women can be that naturally skinny in only rare cases, but it makes them look quite sickly to those around them, Japanese girls are smaller, but not usually that small. And that's even putting into question that these statistics are true, considering she's probably shorter than that and even slimmer. I've seen ridiculous fucking 39 kilogram weights put for 155 cm models, and sighed, because ohgod that's unhealthy too, but 162? Bro, this is just too much.

my sister was near exact height and weight that Mayuko is, but as a thirteen year old girl. Thirteen. THIRTEEN!

She is now 5'7" and weighs more than I do, and I'm 110 lbs! 84 lbs? That is the size of a child! A child!!! A child! Even if you are short, that is still very small.

Mayuko is the model I look at and I kind of have to suppress the urge NOT to stare at the twigs that are her legs. Mayuko is the kind of girl who gets my visceral urge to start downing laxatives again going. Mayuko is just a bad, bad, bad, bad bad example, and even in the fashion industry I think using her is a bit far fetched. And they still photoshop the FUCK out of her.

She's merely the worst example Vivi and other magazines provide to young and influential, stupid girls, who think that they can just get by on a cracker a day tryin' to look like that. Just because they have pretty faces doesn't mean they're not hurting their bodies as models, girls, the one thing models won't ever admit until their career is over is that they hurt themselves modeling, that they suffered from eating disorders, etc. Some models are naturally thin, but many more struggle by with miniscule portions and excessive exercise just to satisfy their photographers, editors, and agencies by the end of the day. It's not a glamorous job.

Point more taken, it's not something to aspire to be.

But when a young Japanese girl sees attractive clothing ON a very small model, what do you think they think?

Well, it looks good on her, but will it flatter me? 

And as she keeps flipping...
Oh, they're all really skinny....
How many pounds do I need to lose....
I look so fat....

A diet section??!!!!

That's right, ladies and gentleman, in a land where there's already an extreme expectation for slimness, in a magazine that's supposed to bolster the self esteem of girls by making them want really cute clothes, there is a DIET SECTION. Popteen, in fact, the main gyaru magazine, released a full DIET BOOK. Japan's eating disorders are on the rise, and yet, here we are, still expecting these young, probably already skinny Japanese girls to get down to 40 fuckin kilos to satisfy the ever growing trend of making clothing smaller. 50 isn't FAT, 50 isn't even remotely fat, I weigh 50 and I think that's lucky considering how much SHIT I down per day in soda calories. And even on a shorter girl, they can carry 50 just fine, so why is THIS a thing?

The model in question in Popteen's "diet book" inset, is Kumicky. Kumicky weighed an absurdly small 43 kilograms already, she looked actually pretty good at that weight, small, but with some extra pounds on her teeny frame, she was nowhere NEAR fat. The diet book says she went down to 38.....
of course, it gets worse when she's depicted in a teeny bikini.

 An already skinny girl like Kumicky didn't need that weight loss, and neither do most Japanese girls. Most Japanese girls are pretty damn small compared to westerners that I've seen, but I can't believe the magazine even stresses absurdity such as this, that you'll somehow make a mark on the world by being 83 lbs, as if it's a desirable weight that won't affect your health whatsoever and you'll feel better or some shit. That is eating disorder influencing talk, right there. It's gross. Just plain gross. Stop that. STOPTHAT!

I wouldn't be so irked by this if it weren't lying out in front of me in black and white, on the pages, even in Japanese. I wouldn't be so irked if it didn't span as many pages as it did. The sheer dedication to vanity, and feeding girls' minds unhealthy thoughts, unhealthy thoughts that they are likely to follow as young girls, is just plain terrible.

 As fashion styles keep getting smaller and smaller and Japan's deniability grows that they do have a problem with unobtainable fuckin' beauty standards, more girls fall pray to the ideology they praise that diet pills, quickie starvation, massive calorie reduction, and even starvation, are the way to go, and though they don't suggest this outright, it's subtly crept in there. It's subtle in the way that they basically know how to worm their way into a female subconscious, the writers, to try and get people to buy their clothes, but no, they can't be fat or ugly, so they decide to place diet sections in the middle of the mag to encourage the readers to drop enough weight that they resemble the models in question. 

And it's just not fucking healthy, I say this especially for 13 year olds reading the magazines, to be telling a girl that her vanity is her biggest prize, even in an appearance conscious society, that's pretty fuckin' warped. Guess what? The models are gorgeous, and if you're not a model, that's ok! If you're over 50 kg, good for you, you don't have to weigh 40! You never see that in these magazines. All you see is diet diet diet, clothes clothes clothes, boys boys boys, and it's all stressed 10x worse than the american adaptions of these types of mags. I had my time on diet pills and starvation, I for one now know that I can't ever obtain Japanese model ideal unless I basically kill myself, but the lot of girls reading these in Japan don't.  

I was admittedly raised by a narcissit, she didn't always tell me outright that she found me to be sloppy, ugly, or unkempt looking, or fat, but I could see it in her eyes. My mother shitted on me from the time I was a child for not taking care of my looks according to her narcissistic standards and I grew into a very insecure, sick teenager because of that. I think while young girls should read magazines freely as they please, they shouldn't take them to heart, and they certainly shouldn't go overboard. Even if their parents beg them to go on a diet, they shouldn't follow others whims just to meet Japan's ridiculous societal standard of beauty. If they choose to lose weight, they should do it for themselves on their own fuckin' accord. And these magazines aren't helping what with their "our model was underweight and now she looks like a concentration camp victim!" crap.

Fuck the 60 cm waist ideal, young Japanese ladies, eat as much ice cream as you fucking want, and flaunt the fashion shown on the pages of those fashion magazines as you are.

We can't all be Sasaki.

Not that I'd want to be.

 Nor can we be Mayuko.

Japanese Fashion Magazines: The Good (Long, image heavy)

In my short time reading and looking at Japanese fashion magazines as an admitted n00b (to the full "experience", looking at particular spreads on Tumblr doesn't count), considering my favoritism towards Asian fashion, Japanese in particular (because let's face it, Glorious Nihongo (hahahahahahahahahha i can't believe i just typed that) has better taste than us Filthy Westerners, I have learned a few things. 

Staring at a few issues of Vivi, Popteen, and Non-no don't grant me some diploma or even full expertise, but as a nugu, I have made many observations, that i have camped into pros and cons for conveniences' sake.


The Good

Japanese fashion is cute.

Though it obviously contains some western staples, still capitalizing on things like crop tops, it does so differently and BETTER than the western fashion magazines do. The majority of the styling in the spreads, is done in a very flattering, cute way, and though there is definitely no guarantee that I wouldn't look like a landwhale in what Japanese girls wear, I want their outfits... soo oooo bad.

the polka dot top is very cute, does it come in a size that doesn't show midriff? 

cutesy girly dresses, if only I had a date to wear them to.
*begins crying about how men don't find my 12 year old looking face attractive*

i have a top like that, actually. kind of.

In addition to that, they also outfit them in the cutest little skirts, most of which I have only been able to find at American Apparel online (for absurd prices too, unlike the one I own, because it's not the factory outlet site, boo fuckin' hoo), like the white skirt I wore here, and an array of other styles that I haven't been able to find in any of the stores that I shop at. 

where art thou, denim miniskirt? where art thou????? besides american fucking apparel where you cost over thirty bucks?

Then again, I'm maybe just looking in the wrong place, but it doesn't seem like anyone sells denim, high waisted skirts anymore.... or denim skirts at all. It's probably the wrong season to be asking why retailers aren't carrying them, since everyone is focused on winter season clothing, even though here, it's the last thing we need.

Context, Texas weather fluctuates between mildly warm and lobster broiling, "I want to die because it's one hundred degrees out", hot. 

Every other year or so, we will get snow during the winter, but more often we get ice, and all the schools close promptly to avoid the consequences of dealing with paternal backlash, as nobody here knows how to fuckin' drive on ice without skidding and colliding with something.

So in other words, when I see bitches in the mall sellin' parkas...


In comparison to American magazines, JP fashion magazines rely a HELL of a lot more on muted colors or pastels, which is a breath of fresh air over the ugly ass neon I see in west fashion spreads. They don't have excess vibrancy, they don't look like they could be seen from a thousand feet away, the coloring is very subtly done without being one hundred percent SHOVED IN YOUR FACE. Let me put it this way, while Japanese fashion is some guy screaming at the top of his lungs - "LOOK AT ME EVERYBODY, COME LOOK AT ME, NEON NEON NEON", JP fashion coloring is a very subtle, slow, come hither look, it gets your attention but it doesn't overwhelm. When they do use more vibrant clothes, they at least make sure they correspond well with the other articles.

Here's an example of them using base colors.

I don't know what the fuck is with whoever did the hats here, but I like the clothes, looks like AHS Coven vomited all over them. Fiona Goode, you put it best.

 The left reminds me of my old school uniform back when I was enrolled in private school. They were actually kind of cute in hindsight. Actually, what sucks is that the uniform skirts got even cuter during high school, but I left long before. The issue was, they weren't made of light and airy material like this, they were fucking "sweltering woolish type shit, heats up to a thousand degrees in the blazing Texas sun". That I do not miss.

Hafu Models

Hafu, translated as literally, half, is a word used to describe someone who is half Japanese and half another ethnicity. 

In hafu couplings the father more often is the foreign parent while the mother is the Japanese parent, lots of hafu children were born with United States or other countries' military personnel for fathers, and a naturalized Japanese mother. Apparently JP woman crave the 'murican dick, probably because even small 'murican dick is a vast improvement over the teeny azn d.

The Japanese are very testy about the one / two base/s left in Japan because they don't want Filthy Westerners imposing on their land. 

moreover, the lot of older Japanese are just plain xenophobic / racist, living in a primarily homogeneous society like Japan, that tends to happen. Anyway...

Hafus have become more prevalent in the Japanese entertainment industry in Japan, you see hafu singers in Japan, actors, actresses, but more often than the former, you see hafu models. Hafu are kind of a fetish in Japan. Despite the older gen's griping, the younger gen tends to LOVE them.

They combine the prized and sought after white western features Japan tried so hard to emulate with their giant circle lens, porcelain pale skin, knobby little bodies, and the dark and beautiful Asian features together, creating what many younger Japanese find to be super kawaiiiiiieh. Vivi in particular has a variety of hafu models, such as:

Rola is actually only a quarter Japanese, her mother is a hafu (Russian and Japanese), while her father is of Bangladeshi descent, but the lot still qualify her under the hafu umbrella. She has graced many a Vivi cover. 

Rola is not considered a full fledged "exclusive model" for Vivi, but she frequents the cover and the contents inside. She speaks Japanese, English, and Bengali. 

In addition to being multilingual, Rola also worked as a tarento. Worked, past tense.

Like the haul of hafu tarentos, she was cast out to the same realm as Becky because she got 2old4thenihongodes.

Hafu tarentos can be seen as either a lasting novelty or a one trick pony, but all lasting novelties eventually become one trick ponies as they age past their prime and into what as well might be obscurity, if their "talent" starts to become boring and doesn't keep them afloat.
Oh, Becky.

I particularly like Rola's features a little over the other girls, though Fuji Lena almost beats her, because the others are pale as hell, but Rola actually has some color to her skin, despite the fact that they try to whitewash the hell out of it. Her eyes also have a very pretty tint to them, almost greenish, not sure whether that's the circle lenses or not. Being only a quarter, she is significantly more "exotic" than her fellow models.

Tamashiro Tina
Tina is one of the youngest Vivi models, at only seventeen years old, and has a very distinctive look to her.
Despite the fact that she's still got that glassy eyed, not-quite-human doll-eyed look to her that many JP models do, there's something about her that's just so damn adorable!
She doesn't smile a lot, but she still exudes some sort of weird cuteness. Her mother is Japanese, while her father is an American. She's got a good balance of both Western and Asian features, and she rocks a bob.

Maggy (formerly Natsuki Margaret)
Maggy is another hafu, and like Rola, multilingual, speaking Japanese and English. 

Her father, Ian Gibb, is a Scotsman from Canada, while her mother is Japanese. 

Maggy is, in my humble opinion, the most "white looking" model of the hafu bunch, she can't escape those thick brows and reddish hair, but that really doesn't discount any of her adorableness compared to the rest.

In fact, her eyebrow game's top notch. She has a way of looking far more European than the rest of her cohorts, but not overly European, if that makes sense. Despite looking quite Caucasian, she still has a tinge of Asian features about her, but they're nowhere near as "balanced" as Tina's.

Emma, stylized as emma, is another one of ViVi's hafu models. Her father is British, and her mother is Japanese.

Emma is actually older than youngest model by over three years, but has the appearance of someone much younger. Not to say she's not adorable, but like Tina, i feel a bit creepy looking at them both, and that's coming from someone who looks twelve. Like, "excuse me, who let you out of middle school to wear those crop tops, go back and change, young lady!"

She also has a good balance of Caucasian and Asian features, similarly to Tina.

4. The styling; the makeup, the hair, and the presentation of the clothes

The way the scenes are photographed for JP fashion mags are done very nicely, despite the copious photoshopping that clearly plagues the pages. There's a lot of alterations between outdoor and indoor setting, which makes for some nice scenery changes.

Each model has their own sort of niche, you never really see Tina or emma smile, and if they do show expression, it's usually in the form of a pout or a tongue sticking, Trindl always seems to be more peppy looking than the others, Kawakita's job is basically looking like she's about to snap in half, blah blah blah blaaaaaaaaah. The other models are a bit meh, not as good looking as the hafus, perhaps save for Miyagi and Kawakita.

Overall, though, Japanese fashion magazines tend to do a better job with layouts, design, and presentation compared to their American sisters. They present their fashion in a way that won't get girls banned from class, usually, without showing excess midriff, they present themselves very nicely, in a way that isn't going to get a girl designated or deemed a slut or whore, and Japanese fashion is a definite breath of fresh air from the weird crazes like harem pants sweeping America. If only I could find some that would fit.


The "good" parts of Japanese fashion magazines may vary from person to person, many find their issues with the styles featured based on personal preference, I alternate between dressing like a slob and dressing like a pseudo cutesy girly girl, while simultaneously trying to accommodate the fact that shirts are never long enough for my giraffe torso, but I'm quite pleased with the cute styles featured therein. The photography gets the job done, and the layout is decent as well, it's not perfect, 100%, but I still think the editing is better than the American fashion magazines'. Now, onto the bad.

Wednesday, August 19, 2015


I actually like the illusion denim skirts give, or at least this one, which I bought from a significantly discounted american appearal factory outlet in the SoHo district (because otherwise I'd have paid like forty bucks) while in NY. It gives the viewer, and myself, illusion of slimness when I'm actually a big chunk.

I don't have any muscle definition like I used to eeeeeeeggggghgghhhhgggy I've gotten so laaaaaazy.

At last I am… Hara!!

Yes… at last

Wait… waiiiiit…


The illusion is gone…
( ´ ▽ ` )ノ

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

K-Fashion Perils: One Size (Supposedly) Fits All

Onto other things on my mind, I once considered ordering kfashion online, thinking it wouldn't be as massive a cost as everyone says it is, at least, compared to the nightmarish prices of Japanese clothes (and the fact that they wouldn't probably even be able to fit over my fat gajin tittays) - and I realized they weren't necessarily wrong. But I kept stumbling upon sites claiming to sell mostly "one sized" things, from shirts to swimsuits. In the United States, I guess, in the land of Fat Foreign Fucks, we don't market or sell "one size" things frequently that I've seen, especially not shirts. God forbid some obese size 22 feminista can't find a 3XL shirt in the United States, god forbid the United States have non obsese people in a country where the obesity rate apparently boasts over 40% ! so I was completely baffled by the fact that in Korea, there were so many "one size" clothes, until I found clarification.

Ok, first of all, Korea is one of the thinnest countries, or at least, healthiest countries in the world, with one of the lowest recorded obesity rates in the world, alongside most other parts of East Asia; Japan, China, etc. So ergo, they do have different standards. I guess I should've expected that. They also have nitpickier standards when it comes to who is fat vs who is not, as in, they are very critical, which is why their idols are lighter than their American counterparts, blah blah blah, to say there's not a certain glorification of thinness would be outright lying, of course, that's unfortunate for a Westerner who comes to Korea, Japan, etc, or at least, a rather heavyset Westerner.

Now, I wouldn't call myself heavy, I don't think myself thin either, for someone who's like, 5'7" to 5'8" and 110 I still thnk most of my weight is fat based since i've gotten out of shape, but even I have skepticism that I can fit in teeny Korean "one size" clothing. Appearantly in Korea it's difficult to even find a bra to fit breasts above a C or D cup, or if you can trust word from Martina from EYK.

Another "apparently", most shops don't let you "try on" these one size articles while shopping in Korea physically, which is what really piqued my NOPE meter here.

I'm not sure what online stores would do in the case that a clothing article did not fit, and the lot of the k-fashion sites I've gone to are free sized based, and give little information aside from the length of tops or shirts, no mention of the bust, waist, hip size or anything. I don't know. As a 34C, maybe a 36B, somewhere stranded in between.... 25 inch waist, big by azn standards (ridiculous standards), and around a 34 inch hips I just don't see the point in it. I love the cuteness of Asian clothing, I love the style, but I want something that'd at least fit me properly if I were going to order it, I don't want to risk ending up with tiny freesize items that'll be able to fit around my calf muscle and not the rest of me. But all the same, I want a few cute Asian fashion items....

ghhh, as the Koreans would say... 아이고

SNSD / GG "You Think" MV & Screencaps (Image Heavy)

Ah, yes, SNSD, my first group and my admitted bias group. I have been with them since the RDR era, through the mess that was the IGAB era, the Catch Me If You Can weirdness, through the frank mediocrity that was PARTY, in spite of its awesome, should've been title track b-side, the far superior Check (which I'm glad was included on Lion Heart or else I'd probably be tearing someone at SM's hair out), I am admittedly a bit too much of a sucker for what SNSD has done in the past, despite some of their *ahem**coughcough* "recent" *coughcough* releases prior were just fucking hot messes. *cough*IGOTABOY*cough*.

IGAB was a weird era. The title song itself was a mess, but the CONCEPT was the true mess.

It was like the stylists at SM took some costumes intended for the quirky f(x), tossed them in the same garbage bin YG and 2NE1 used, and someone decided to go raid the trash for inspiration, found the leftovers, and decided to use them for GG, along with some wigs snatched from the department in charge of TTS, and combined the three to form whatever IGAB's mismatched, denim, jeremy scott esque nonsense was. It was far from their usual concept, it was outlandishly NOT THEM, it seemed like SM had handed off a f(x) concept to SNSD with no reason whatsoever.

 The girls makeup styling wasn't totally trashed during the IGAB area, but that couldn't even save the sheer amount of weirdness that was the promotional pictures, the photobook, and the video. Mostly the photobook... for example, one of Sunny's hairstyles. It looks like they drew inspiration from a moptop canary that mated with Big Bird. Jesus CHRIST.

May we hope and may we pray that Sunny's hair never sees this kind of unethical treatment again.

 This time, at least, SM seems to understand what a mess they made, and ergo went with something a little tamer for Lion Heart and You Think. The teaser pictures released were nice, stylistically trumping the vibrant hellscape that was the IGAB era (especially the Lion Heart ones).

 My main gripe, and why I feel Lion Heart was the more aesthetically appealing, better done video over "You Think", was that "You Think" had slight problems with its concept, mostly because someone over at SM thought it would be wise to have the girls wear a lot of unneeded belts. But it's still pretty minor and i'd consider it a vast improvement over anything the IGAB era had to offer (besides Sica...)

The styling in the video was on point, even if the belts were a bit excessive, everyone looks reasonably hot, the hair colors and makeup aren't too jarring, the clothes are relatively fitting for the concept, minus the belts (fuck whoever came up with that, fuck the belts in general, fuck the fucker who decided that somehow emulating the megane fucker from AMNESIA, also known as the dude of a thousand belts).

 The song itself is pretty decent and much of a step up from PARTY's generic, light, breezy, production- that was easily overshadowed by far superior summer releases (though Check is still my fucking jam). In contrast to its predecessor, You Think is a loud, thumping dance track. It's not some breezy bubbly affair, and it's not a bopping throwback like the coupling track "Lion Heart". It's strong and sassy, though I expected upon hearing the demo that the girls would adapt it pretty well, so I wasn't worried.

I have always enjoyed the way SNSD's songs have sounded, how the members sound individually, and how they sound together harmonizing. Though the demo was leaked a while ago, and though I am quite used to SAARA's engiish version, I do not find SNSD's version to be a step down. I think they sung it well, suitably. 

I think it is a well produced and catchy song.The demo was more processed than SNSD's version, it might take a little getting used to to get SAARA's more computerized sass out of my mind, tho....

Of course, there's a catch, there always is.

srry sm, you ain't free from my criticisms cuz'a my bias

They just HAD to leave the rap section in, as short as it is, they just had to leave that in?

 Come on, SM, we already established this with IGAB. pretty much no one can fucking rap in SNSD. 

At LEAST they didn't give it to Tiffany (*gag*), I can handle Hyo rapping. 

In other departments, the dance was fairly good, lots of hot gyrating, as expected with a jam like this, I don't know choreo very well, so I don't consider myself a worthy judge for such things. I think it was very befitting considering.

 I particularly like when Seo broke into a split. Dayyuuuum.

All in all, You Think is far from the perfect song, but it hearkens back to a more likable era of GG that didn't include messy compositions and nonsense raps spread throughout the song. Does it have its flaws? Yes, but is it listenable. is is good, is it a catchy comeback song that blows PARTY out of the water? Hell to the yeah.This is a vast improvement over meh meh meh P A H T YY YYYY. The video, and the girls, look far hotter than their flouncy, jean and white top PARTY counterparts, they look confident and fierce. Except for the belts. Unless SM's decided to take their name a little too literally and start catering to the sadomasochist, bdsm play crowd, there REALLY ain't a need for that many belts.

So, without further ado, a shitton of screencapas exhibiting both the overuse of belts and general hotness. Someone should especially give Tae's stylist a raise in particular here. Holy shit, she looks flawless.

in other words if you came here lookin'4fap material, here's some 
in fact,here they all are in a google folder 

I might recap this if logoless ever comes out, because the sm logo is annoying as shit