actually not even dysmorphia I'm just fugly
Not even Debby Ryan or Demi Lovato or any of the 'formerly fat' disney bitches thin
Let alone hyosung thin.
Let alone VS model thin.
I am going to cry
this diet was supposed to work.
I was supposed to eat barely anything for dinner but I think I've been gorging myself during dinner anyway
This is humiliating.
My fat body, I'm showcasing it to the world.
I hate the size of my rib cage and hips the most. I'm a size 34/36 in bras (around the ribcage) but my ribs look fucking massive.
I look disproportional.
My genes aren't supposed to be this way. I need to be thin. I want to be thin. I want it badly. Like a basement dweller who craves real life sexual contact.
No guy has even talked to me or bothered to acknowledge my existence.
No boyfriend even at 16 - fucking pitiful
It hurts, just the slightest bit.
To be alone, and not cared about by anyone.
And be stuck with this DISEASE, this warped perception of myself.
God. My feels are all over the place.
I can't get this off my chest enough. I hate how I look, I hate myself, but I can still be humorous and hateful towards others and laugh and act normal.
But on the inside I'm being eaten, eaten away.
I'm goddamned bipolar.... aren't I